What Does It Mean to Live a Life of Love?

In the midst of a world of division, bitterness, and war, the Church of Jesus Christ has the answer for us to find unity and harmony. But sadly, many churches and many Christians ignore it.

In Ephesians 5, Paul teaches on the topic of unity and harmony in the local church body – a topic that he seemed to touch on quite frequently, at least in his letters to the churches. If you were to go read through this particular chapter, you would see that unity and harmony are really just byproducts of being Spirit-filled and living a Spirit-filled life.

For example, in the first verse of Ephesians 5, Paul sets up his mini-sermon with this thesis in verses 1-2:

“Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.” (ESV)

Then, after explaining a few ways of living that distract from Christian unity (mainly sin), he hits home with this instruction in verses 15-21:

“Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time because the days are evil. Therefore, do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is. And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but be filled with the Spirit… submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.” (ESV)

Paul’s claim is that if we, filled with the Holy Spirit, strive to live our life after the pattern of love set by Jesus Christ when he was on the earth, then it is going to result in wisdom, discipline, understanding, submission to others, and reverence for Christ. These are critical outcomes of the Christian life.

But if you were to go read the whole passage yourself, you might notice that I left out verses 19 and 20. I did that not because I do not like them but simply to drive home a specific point by highlighting them now. Paul wrote that in the middle of our Spirit-filled life, we will:

“addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart, giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ,”

Did you catch that? One primary result of living a life that is in-dwelt and motivated by the Holy Spirit is that we sing. And this singing is not just to God in our own private time of worship (although that is good, too), it is with and even to “one another.” That means that it is corporate singing with our brothers and sisters in Christ. Sure, there are other important fruits of the Spirit that will grow in our life, but as far as an activity that will come out of it, we will sing with others.

While that may seem out of place or odd to some people, it makes total sense. After reflecting on my own life as well as watching the lives of my children, it is abundantly clear that we humans are singing people. We sing all the time! From the smallest child to the oldest adult, we sing constantly (unless we choose not to sing anymore, as I have known some people to do – which is sad). We sing nursery rhymes, Scripture, the alphabet song, “Happy Birthday,” and commercials and jingles. We sing in the car, in the shower, at concerts and parties, and (of course) in church services. We sing when we are in love, when we are sad when we are happy, and (if we are a fan of heavy metal) even when we are angry!

There is a reason that radios or some kind of music player (8-track, tape, CD, mp3, etc.) have become standard in vehicles since the mid-1900s. Because humans like music and we sing! Most parties or other events (even sports events) that I have been to include someone somewhere with a radio, speaker, or instrument playing music for everyone to enjoy. Music has been an integral part of our human nature throughout history, and (unless we fight against it and refuse it), it will always be that way. Some people seem to sing all the time as if life was a musical. On the other extreme, I have seen the most introverted, closed-off, unemotional, and expressionless people come alive and start singing when you play their song.

Since it is so tied to our human nature, music affects us, too. God gave us music as a tool to worship him and give thanks back to him. He also gave us music as a way for us to express our emotions. But music can even influence or drive our emotions (think about the musical score behind a movie scene). Lyrics that are set to music and rhythm stay in our memory quicker and longer, especially when they rhyme. Music can trigger memories from our past and even bring back the feelings that were at one time connected to that memory. Music can bring people together that might seem to have nothing else in common (think about singing at a sporting event or at a party).

In a way, music is a language of its own that can be cross-cultural and cross-generational. And the good news is – every one of us can “speak” that language (some people are better than others, of course). This is why God lists it among the results of a Spirit-filled life and one of the primary factors involved in our Christian unity and harmony. Because when the church body sings together in worship to God, they are unified at least in that moment.

However, because music is so tied to our human nature and emotions (and no matter what we do, we cannot separate them), we all know that music can also be a tool that our enemy uses to drive us apart. When we choose our personal preferences over the joy of others and the unity of our church body, music no longer serves its God-given purpose. We have seen this happen in churches across our world for at least the last century (and I would assume all the way back to the beginning of music when humans strummed their first string or sang their first note).

This is why Paul gives us several key reminders in this passage to make sure that we use music as a tool for unity and not division in our church congregations. For example, he is reminding us to live in and follow the Holy Spirit, to seek to imitate the life and character of Jesus Christ, to walk in love and wisdom, to not waste our time on frivolous things, to not be motivated by anything other than the Spirit in us, to express our thanksgiving to God in our singing (instead of complaining), and to remember to address “one another” through our singing (instead of just focusing on ourself).

And lastly, Paul gives us the three categories of worship music that cover it all: “psalms and hymns and spiritual songs.”

If you want to have unity in your church over music, then follow God’s Word in this passage to use it as the tool of unity that it was designed for and find ways to submit to one another by putting your personal preferences and opinions below there’s.

Church, let’s sing together!

Robert Hampshire is a pastor, teacher, writer, and leader. He has been married to Rebecca since 2008 and has three children, Brooklyn, Bryson, and Abram. Robert attended North Greenville University in South Carolina for his undergraduate and Liberty University in Virginia for his Masters. He has served in a variety of roles as a worship pastor, youth pastor, family pastor, church planter, and now Pastor of Worship and Discipleship at Cheraw First Baptist Church in South Carolina. He furthers his ministry through his blog site, Faithful Thinking, and his YouTube channel. His life goal is to serve God and His Church by reaching the lost with the gospel, making devoted disciples, equipping and empowering others to go further in their faith and calling, and leading a culture of multiplication for the glory of God. Find out more about him here.