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Chit chat. Small talk. Water cooler conversation. Whatever you call it, generally speaking, introverts aren\u2019t fans. We tend to avoid it.<\/p>\n
We know it when we hear it. The topic may be sports, the weather, favorite foods, or other miscellany. The conversation that ensues remains shallow, even trivial, and often just plain boring.<\/p>\n
But here\u2019s the thing. It\u2019s essential to building relationships.<\/em> Yes, even introverts need relationships. Especially Christian<\/em> introverts.<\/p>\n As followers of Christ who are active parts of his body, the Church, because we are introverts is not an excuse to avoid people and relationships. Being in relationship, doing what has been called \u201cbody life\u201d in the church, is necessary for spiritual health and maturity.<\/p>\n God doesn\u2019t call us to be loners in the faith<\/strong><\/p>\n Hebrews 10:25 is the go-to verse that cautions against isolation, especially as a habit. Rather, it is in gathering together that we can find encouragement, fellowship, and strength for living godly lives day in and day out. Being on our own all the time is not healthy.<\/p>\n This means we need to engage in small talk to seed those very necessary holy relationships.<\/p>\n Adam McHugh writes in Introverts in the Church <\/em>(2nd ed.), \u201cthe reality is that small talk is essential for building relationships; in small talk, we establish initial connections with others that we may wish to pursue further.\u201d<\/p>\n It\u2019s in initial chit chat that we learn basics about one another that become building blocks for a deeper relationship. In small talk we can share about ourselves in small bits, establish trust, and work slowly toward spiritual intimacy.<\/p>\n But how to do it? This can be challenging for introverts. Chit chat doesn\u2019t come naturally to us. Since we tend to avoid it and don\u2019t think fast as extroverts do, we can be at a loss for words.<\/p>\n Three tips for chit chat success<\/strong><\/p>\n Here are three simple tips to help you survive and thrive with small talk:<\/p>\n Listen carefully as they share. If you have a mutual interest, that is great fodder to keep things rolling.<\/p>\n The bottom line is this. As Christian introverts, we will need to pull back from people and recharge alone. But we are not loners. We are called to be active, participating, giving, and receiving believers within the larger fellowship of believers. Fellowship is not an option, it\u2019s a requirement.<\/p>\n So, how about those Mets?<\/p>\n Agree? Disagree? Love it? Hate it? Have a question about this column? Email Stephen at <\/em>cnjintrovert@gmail.com<\/em><\/a>. Share your story about being a Christian introvert or let me know a specific topic you\u2019d like to see addressed.<\/em><\/p>\n Stephen R. Clark is a writer who lives in Lansdale, PA with his wife, BethAnn, where they are members of Immanuel Church. His website is www.StephenRayClark.com<\/a>. He is a member of the Evangelical Press Association and managing editor of the Christian Freelance Writers Network<\/a> blog. He is also a news writer for The Baptist Paper<\/a> and contributor to the Englewood Review of Books<\/a>. His writing has appeared in several publications. The content of this column is copyright \u00a9 by Stephen R. Clark.<\/p>\n<\/p><\/div>\n\n
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