{"id":10979,"date":"2024-02-22T18:13:44","date_gmt":"2024-02-22T12:43:44","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/cccfornews.com\/index.php\/2024\/02\/22\/3-things-to-avoid-when-ministering-to-those-suffering-from-mental-illness\/"},"modified":"2024-02-22T18:13:44","modified_gmt":"2024-02-22T12:43:44","slug":"3-things-to-avoid-when-ministering-to-those-suffering-from-mental-illness","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/cccfornews.com\/index.php\/2024\/02\/22\/3-things-to-avoid-when-ministering-to-those-suffering-from-mental-illness\/","title":{"rendered":"3 Things to Avoid When Ministering to Those Suffering from Mental Illness"},"content":{"rendered":"


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Common Pitfalls Are Silence, Platitudes, and Error<\/h2>\n

We make many mistakes in what we say to sufferers. Partly because of ignorance, discomfort, or fear, we end up saying nothing, or nothing helpful, or everything wrong. These are all pitfalls to avoid, so let\u2019s look at them more closely and explore how to make our words healing bridges rather than damaging holes. <\/p>\n

Some of the biggest pitfalls to avoid are silence, platitudes, and mistakes. <\/p>\n

Silence is a pitfall.<\/em> Although there are times when silence is appropriate, too much of it is unhelpful to the mentally ill. That\u2019s because they will often misinterpret silence as lack of love, concern, or sympathy. They may even read criticism into your silence. Another way of silence harming the mentally ill is when we simply avoid them. We don\u2019t visit them, or we don\u2019t stop and talk with them. Again, this silence does not go unnoticed and can add to the suffering.<\/p>\n

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David Murray<\/a>, <\/p>\n

Tom Karel<\/a><\/p>\n

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This accessible resource answers 30 commonly asked questions about mental health from a Christian perspective, providing caregivers with the biblical wisdom necessary to care for those with mental illnesses.<\/p>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<\/div>\n

Platitudes are a pitfall.<\/em> The second worst thing to silence is clich\u00e9s and platitudes. Pep talks and patronizing advice are agonies. These usually come in one of three categories. The first category is false promises, which means assuring people of quick and easy recovery with no basis in fact. \u201cYou will be better soon . . . This will pass . . . You\u2019ll get over it . . . This will be sanctified to you . . . I know how you feel . . .\u201d <\/p>\n

The second category of platitudes is false equivalents, which is when we compare sufferers to others, usually unfavorably. \u201cThere are others worse off . . . It could be worse . . . I know somebody else with this . . .\u201d When a person is mentally ill, it often feels like there\u2019s no one else in the world like this. Comparing them to others only makes them feel worse. <\/p>\n

The third category of platitudes is false \u201cshoulds,\u201d which impose obligations on people or set unrealistic expectations. \u201cYou should get out more . . . You should stop taking meds . . . You should repent . . . You should trust God more . . .\u201d Many mentally ill people already impose a huge number of false \u201cshoulds\u201d on themselves, and therefore this only increases the pain. \u201cShould\u201d or \u201cought to\u201d statements convey a sense of superiority of the speaker to the inferior sufferer, resulting in more shame and alienation. <\/p>\n

All of these are platitudes that people hear in other contexts and just thoughtlessly apply to this unique situation without considering how devastating they can be. <\/p>\n

Error is a pitfall.<\/em> The greatest error we can make is condemnation. Usually, the worst thing you can do is criticize people with mental illness, tell them that they are to blame, they are guilty, they are weak, they are not being Christian, and so on. In many cases it\u2019s like blaming someone for having cancer or diabetes. It is grossly unfair and heaps false guilt on top of everything else. <\/p>\n

The second error is that of amateur diagnosis. One thing the mentally ill often have to contend with is people who know nothing volunteering or even forcing their own diagnoses and prescriptions on them. They pick up pieces of information in popular culture or on websites, or from some extremist or other, and then use that little knowledge to attempt to cure someone with mental illness. This is not only foolish; it\u2019s dangerous.<\/p>\n

We don\u2019t want to fall into any of these pitfalls, do we? So, if these are the negatives, what are the positives? If these are pitfalls to avoid, what are the ways to build bridges?<\/p>\n

Good Bridges Are Confession, Learning, and Prayer<\/h2>\n

First, admit the difficulty<\/em>. Confess to God and to sufferers that we\u2019ve made mistakes in the past, we\u2019ve fallen into pitfalls, but we want to be constructive, not destructive, going forward. Talk to the person and \u201csay sorry\u201d for wrongs done and said in the past. Ask them for help to speak wisely and helpfully into their lives. \u201cI don\u2019t know what to say, and I wish I had some really good advice. Just know that I care and will be praying for you.\u201d Give them permission to let you know when you are being helpful or unhelpful. Pray for wisdom from above to speak wisely and winningly so that no one loses.<\/p>\n

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Pray for wisdom from above to speak wisely and winningly so that no one loses.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Second, learn from others. Talk to friends and family of other mentally ill people and ask them what they\u2019ve found works and what doesn\u2019t. Get permission to talk to any counselor in your loved one\u2019s life and ask them how you can support their work. What you will hear will guide you. For example, you may be advised to <\/p>\n